IT was the day after India's Independence Day. A
thoughtful Tony Blair who had watched the celebrations
on TV got onto the phone with his friend Bush:
"India!" shouted Blair.
"What about India?" asked a startled Bush.
"We English made a mistake George," said Blair, "I
need to get India back as a colony!"
"You serious Tony?" asked a still more startled Bush.
"Yeah this is not the India we let go some sixty years
ago," said Blair, "this is a colony we would be proud
to have now."
"So whatcha plannin' to do?" asked Bush.
"Why George what we did to Saddam. Attack them."
"You sayin' we? You not hoping I'm goin' to join you
are you?"
"I helped you in Iraq George, you forgettin' or
sometin'?"
"Yeah but we had an excuse there Tony, we were lookin'
for weapons of mass destruction, you remember?"
"So we do the same thing here George. We tell the
Indians to give up their weapons of mass destruction!"
"I don't know whether we are doing the right thing
Tony, India's a democracy you know?"
"I lied for you in Iraq George. Nearly lost the
elections for you. I'm sure you could do this lil'
favour for me. With India back as my colony, we'll be
back as a world power! Britain rules the world! You
heard that phrase George?"
"I thought it was America who was doin' the rulin'
Tony."
"We'll do the rulin' together George. You and me will
be equal partners once I get my India back. Come on
George talk to that Manmohan feller, tell him to give
up his weapons of mass destruction, or else..!"
"Okay Tony since you insist. Can call me back in five
minutes."
"Shall I get my ships ready?"
"For what?" asked a surprised Bush.
"For war dammit," shouted Tony as he put the phone
down and waited for Bush to talk to the Indian Prime
Minister.
He walked over to a little globe he had on
his office table and circled India gleefully.
The phone rang and he ran to pick it up.
"Tony it's me," said George, "how many ships you got
ready?"
"Aye aye sir, the Royal Navy is ready for action!"
said Tony, standing at attention.
"You can send them to India," said Bush.
"To fight?" asked Blair happily."
"No to pick up their weapons of mass destruction."
"Whatcha talkin' about?" asked a confused Blair.
"Manmohan said you would know 'cause it's your people
who made them," said Bush.
"What weapons of mass destruction?" whispered Blair
uncertainly.
"Their politicians, their MP's, their MLA's," said
Bush happily, "Manmohan said you could take them all
back to England where they were trained years ago by
yer people to divide and rule..!"
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